Felt-A-Frump

Poke America
Great Again

 

If you care about America’s greatness, you need a Felt-A-Frump needle felting kit. For just $35, you get all the materials to make your own frumpy, xenophobic head-of-state. And because nobody respects women, immigrants, DREAMers, refugees, LGBTers, freedom-of-speeches and civil liberty-ers more than we do, we’re donating all profits to the ACLU. 

Don’t be a "loser". Buy a Felt-A-Frump now and help us Poke America Great Again.

 

  • All the wool and thread you need

  • 3 felting needles

  • Finger Guards

  • Foam poking board

  • Step-by-step instructions
     

Felt-A-Frump Needle Felting Kit
35.00
Quantity:
Add To Cart

Warnings:

Whether you’re felting a Frump or running a country, it’s always best to take your time and focus on the task in front of you to avoid injuries, poor results or jail time. Please observe the warnings below before you begin Poking America Great Again.

 

Caution:

Needles are fragile and sharp. Misuse could result in choking, cuts, bleeding and other injuries. Keep all materials away from kids and anyone under the age of 18.

Felt-A-Frump and The Stucker Brothers LLC are not responsible for any injuries sustained from using our needles or products. Felt your Frump at your own risk.

  • Carefully slide the needle back into foam mat after use and store away from children.
  • Like our leader’s ego, materials are fragile and a choking hazard. 
  • Don’t bend or twist needles. They’ll break.
  • If a needle breaks, wrap up the pieces and dispose outside of your home.
  • Wear finger guards.
  • Finger guards reduce the pain but do not protect you from the needles.
  • Always use the felting mat for safety. 

Not intended for use in:

  • Knitting
  • Body piercing
  • Cooking
  • Acupuncture
  • Hair plugs
  • Tanning
  • Torture
  • Tweeting
  • Constructing border walls
  • Natural hand enlargement therapy
  • Threatening or insulting leaders of ally countries
  • Befriending leaders of enemy countries
  • Grabbing pussies

Neither Felt-A-Frump nor The Stucker Brothers LLC has any affiliation with the ACLU or any nonprofit, charity, political organization or political party. All donations are made at the discretion of The Stucker Brothers LLC.

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